Last Splash

The gene pool could use a little Chlorine.

http://www.washingtondc.craigslist.org/m4w/112432391.html

Settle in with a drink, this could be awhile...

So, I'm off today, and really wanted to post because it's been a week, but I wasn't feeling particularly inspired. Sure, I could discuss my personal politics or the tremendous performance my store had over the weekend, but those things are boring to other people, and I loathe to be boring. I was checking in with mo'timers, wondering if American Baby had arrived yet (tomorrow is the big day, congratulations) when I came across the above link in a post Jheka made. I urge you to check it out before reading this, but I warn you: it may take the better (or worse) part of an afternoon, so do like I did and skim the parts that interest you. Then come back to me.

Wow. This guy is truly putting himself out there, right? Never have I seen such an honest representation of one's personality, and on craigslist of all places. He has it all figured out, right down to photo opporunities. I can't believe this guy is still single, because I would expect that any man with such strong manly manliness would have females falling all over him, professing how sick they were of 'sensitive' men and how he really knew them better than anyone (because after all, we as a female race are all exactly alike and have the same wants, needs, and desires, and how appropriate that here is the one man that can truly recognize that we want him to make the decision exactly 9 out of 10 times, but he's warm to the fact that that one time we want to choose he is willing to actually listen to us and let us *shock* get our way).

For a while there, I thought he was being witty and sarcastic, and actually started to like him in an amused sort of way, but then it drug on...and on...and on...and he launched into my Favorite Subject...physical attractiveness. Now, I'm no dog, but the reason this tag is called 'meow' is because I am particularly sensitive to the weight=beauty equation. (Some of you would say that's because I'm overweight, and I say "ha ha, you're right, fuck off".) In fact, it's my favorite way to be catty, and probably the most unattractive thing about me is that I'm one of those reverse weight-critical people. I'm one of those awful people that thinks things like "she's not very pretty...he's probably only with her because she's so skinny" or "wow she's beautiful...I'll bet the bitch doesn't know the difference between 'where' and 'wear'..." I know it's awful, I will admit it, but it bothers me that we've seen this shift in society over the last several years. When I was in high school, I was painfully awkward, all 5'8" and 115 pounds of me (no, I was not anorexic, and I tried to gain weight) and all of the boys at school were much more interested in the girls with boobs and a nice thick ass, but it seems that the last 10 years have seen a trend towards hot being Paris Hilton thin, and actresses like Minnie Driver and Kate Winslet are seen as "heavier". I know that everyone says they're beautiful, but all the insipid fashion mags say it like it's this amazing thing, that they've 'made it in Hollywood even though they are a normal size 6 or 8'. (For those of you who want a mental picture of me, look at a photo of good ol' Kate and add fourty-fifty pounds, depending on what kind of day either of us is having.)

Back to our subject: I started to feel very good about my boyfriend as I was reading this. All of my weight issues aside, I still have days when I feel beautiful and sexy and desirable, and part of that is attributed to him and the attitude he has towards me. The way he can't keep his hands off me at the most random times, like when I'm washing dishes, or the way that if I start to undress to take a shower, it doesn't matter what he's doing, his head snaps around quicker than if Pamela Anderson was stripping for him. I love the fact that our relationship is so good towards one another we can look at a picture that he took of me sleeping, and for some reason the way I was laying gave me this larger-than-life belly and he caught me all at the wrong moment, and we laughed uproaringly at the fact that I looked like I was literally, about to give birth (before deleting the pic, of course) and I didn't feel pangs of self-hate. Or that we can say honestly "we really should go to the gym tonight" without one of us thinking "great, he/she's trying to tell me I'm fat and unwanted". This has all been carefully cultivated over the last three years, because before he met me, most of the girls he was interested in were thin, or least that average size 6 or 8. I don't know when the shift occured, but I'm damn thankful for it. He truly makes me feel like there is no woman in the world more desirable, and although I agree that I can't 'let myself go' totally and just stop washing my hair and start eating McDonald's every day, I don't think it's my Job to remain sexy day in and day out. I think that we fell in love for many reasons wholly unattached to how attractive we were to each other, and if that's the biggest thing to holding onto your man, to stay sexy around him and his friends, then that's a doomed relationship from the start.

And when it comes to the part about protecting his woman if she's "about to get raped or something". What?! Has he dated a lot of rape/sexual assault/ domestic violence victims? Now, I know that sexual assault happens to all kinds of women for many different reasons, but if he's surrounding himself with women that are for some reason, likely to be serial targets of rape, then he must seriously have a thing against independent, cheeky, stand-up for themselves women. I have done a lot of research into the fields of sexual and domestic assault, and a lot of these women are succeptible to these relationships because they are weaker and something in them allows their mind to believe they are inferior to their "attacker". Before you get into tirades, yes I know this is a big generalisation, especially when it comes to rape, and I know better than anyone that strong-willed women are just as succeptible in some cases, especially random violence. But when it comes to domestic abuse, more often than not a man that is physically or emotionally abusive will gravitate towards women that are low on self-esteem and high on dependancy. They will stay away from stronger willed women because they know that there is less of a chance they'll be able to 'break them'. Unless they just want a challenge. So, it seems to me that this lunatic wants to surround himself with submissive women, and that's a BIG red-flag.

Now, when it comes to the rest of the post, I think we can safely say that this guy is a wacko. Or has it all figured out. I don't know if this post is about everything I wanted it to be about, but I do feel like I sufficiently got out what was on my mind. And now, this hot mama has to go get some lunch so I can stay "fed and healthy".

posted by: Cannonball14 at 16:42 | link | comments (4) |
meow

Comments:

#1  29 November 2005 - 17:38

 

:-O I'm detecting some sarcasm here. You mean women DON'T want a man like that?!

Windhazel

#2  29 November 2005 - 21:53

 

Well, he is my dream man, but only because he "works hard to keep physically fit".

Cannonball14

#3  02 December 2005 - 08:55

 

If you're wondering about Jheka of dailyblitz, he's fat, balding, slovenly, chronically unemployed and a racist who's been kicked off numerous websites for anti-arab slurs. Google 'jheka' sometime. It's an eye-opener.

Anonymous

#4  02 December 2005 - 14:43

 

That's fantastic. And I wasn't really wondering. I do wonder, however, why you were here as an unlogged visitor and you like to slur other people without leaving a name. I'd love to see your blog.

Cannonball14

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